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Destiny’s children find their wings. Of destiny.

Tenacious D - The Pick Of Destiny
Rachel Lux on 4/10/07 @ 5:47 PM

[3/5] Just when we thought we might never hear Ronnie James Dio and Meat Loaf trading verses on the same song, Tenacious D bring us "Kickapoo," the leadoff track from the band's second album, which doubles as the soundtrack to the movie it shares a name with. And the song doubles as one of the opening scenes in the movie: As a young rocker/fantasy dragon-slayer ("I sliced his fuckin' cackles with a long and shiny blade") living in the town of Kickapoo with his oppressively religious dad (Meat Loaf), Jack Black turns to his Dio poster for inspiration. The poster comes alive, of course, and RJD totally delivers the chalice-hoisting goods, sending Black on his way to Hollywood to meet up with his fated partner-in-rock, Kyle Gass. And that's just track one, dude. With more "fucks," "cocks" and hammy metal spoofs than its predecessor, The Pick Of Destiny makes its mark with pennywhistle-enhanced songs about Bigfoot ("Papagenu (He's My Sassafras)"), post-breakup ballads ("Dude I Totally Miss You") and guest shots from Dave Grohl ("Beezleboss (The Final Showdown)"). Plus Meat Loaf and RJD. Fucking finally. (EPIC) J. Bennett

ROCKS LIKE:
Spinal Tap's Spinal Tap
Electric Six's Fire
Adam Sandler's Stan And Judy's Kid

IN-STORE SESSION WITH JACK BLACK AND KYLE GASS
I love that you got Ronnie James Dio to sing the phrase "hungry for the rock." Taken out of context, it could mean something totally different.
JACK BLACK: It is quite satisfying when he says that line... But wait-how do you know that? Do you have the album already?

Yes, and I've already posted it on my new website, Downloadthepickofdestiny.com.
JB: Holy crap. You son of a bitch.
KYLE GASS: You're taking money out of our pockets.
JB: Yeah, but everyone's just gonna have to buy it anyway because of all the special knick-knacks we stuffed in there.

What kind of knick-knacks?
JB: We put photographs of Tenacious D in there-exclusives.

Are they compromising photographs?
JB: Well, Kyle is in a Cock Monster outfit.
KG: There's actually a shot taken inside my anus. We had to use, like, tubing.

Anus-Cam.
KG: Yeah, fiber-optics.

I think it's safe to say you guys are the first to get Ronnie James Dio and Meat Loaf together on one song.
JB: Yeah, but they never got to meet each other, unfortunately. They did their vocals-and their scenes-on different days. But it's kinda like they're Spider-Man and Batman. They're from different comic books and they can never meet.

Why does the actual Pick Of Destiny look vaguely like that techno-skull that Danzig has been using on his last few albums?
JB: Wow... I did not know. I have to go look and see if we really did rip it off. I bet you we did not, and you're just trying to stir up controversy.
KG: And one thing's for sure: Danzig did not have that pick. [Starts singing "Mother".]
JB: I don't know what you're doing, Kyle. Danzig is one dude you do not wanna fuck with.
KG: Dude, I will squash him like a bug. I will fuckin' spot for him on his bench-press and then drop it.
JB: Well, he's not gonna let you spot for him now. You better come up with a new strategy.

Which one of you dudes can do more cock push-ups?
KG: That's Jack, for sure. I've been experiencing a little erectile dysfunction lately. I'd take Viagra, but the doctor says I'm in danger of having another eight-hour erection.
JB: I actually can't do a cock push-up, either. I think by doing them, you could actually hurt your cock. You could just do regular push-ups until you get an erection and your cock touches the ground, but then don't apply so much weight.

If you could have a superpower for a day, what would it be?
JB: I'm gonna go laser eyes. Everyone probably says flying, so I'm not gonna do that.
KG: Shit, I was gonna say flying, but now I feel like an idiot.
JB: How about power breath?
KG: What's power breath?
JB: It means you have a very powerful blow mechanism. -J. Bennett

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